I’m stuck! I Can’t Lose Weight! Nothing Will Work! #UsFatGirls

“I’m stuck, and nothing will work”!  This has been the topic in the Facebook group this week.  Here are the questions that might help get you ‘un-stuck’!

One step outside#1  To get unstuck you have to change something.

I know this seems like a ‘duh’, but many people don’t want the uncomfortable-ness of whatever it is they need to change. Often, if it is painful, hurts, or is difficult, or too hard – we give up before results can happen. – It IS hard to change something permanently.

#2  If you use the words, “I deserve this” often, you will not successfully lose weight and sustain it. Is this a phrase that is part of your life?

You ‘deserve’ bad food that will hurt you?  What emotionally is going on that those items full of sugar, fat, carbs, and processed additives have become something you “deserve”?  Were treats given to you as a reward?  How are extra pounds a reward?

Does food = love and care?  Then we need to work through some emotional things attached to food.  Food is fuel.  If it has become something else, let’s deal with it honestly.  Can you reward your awesomeness with something other than food?  Withholding bad food isn’t punishment.  Has your thinking labeled it as punishment?  Then let’s deal with that.

#3  What are you eating?

I mean re-evaluate EVERYTHING (even the bit of butter that goes in your skillet before cooking an egg). There are some apps that can help you with tracking. Often we don’t realize how many extra calories we are in-taking because it’s just part of the routine. A mint here, a mint there, grabbing an afternoon coffee/soda. Tracking in an app might give you an objective viewpoint on how your foods might be working against your workouts.

If you “can’t stop eating” something, there is an addiction and dependence there that must be overcome. We need to do a huge heart check about this food item and why it gets to decide so much about your life. Do you really want to lose?  O do you only want to lose if you don’t have to give that up too?

#4  What is your intensity level?

Healthy living is every day – a multitude of tiny choices. If healthy living isn’t in your thoughts as a priority, but rather secondary, so will your weight loss be. This is your life we are talking about. This is a sacred temple you have been given to over-see. When chaos hits, how far down the priority list does it go? Is it like that junk drawer you will clean out eventually? Bring it. You matter. Fight!

#5  Exercise cannot overcome bad eating, no matter how much you work out.

If you can still chat/talk while you are doing the cardio portion of your work out, you aren’t working out hard enough even if you do it for 3 hours. To get your heart rate in the range to burn fat – you physically will not be able to speak/sing at that point. When you workout at this level is hurts, and it is hard, and you breath hard, and things ache, and sweat goes everywhere. Are you able to motivate yourself at this level when you work out? If not, find a person, or a group to push you to what your body needs in order to burn off those extra pounds.

Your body also needs change. If you are doing the same workout schedule you did when you started and it’s not working anymore, it needs to change. Some folks actually workout too much – so their bodies go into conservation mode and tries to hold onto every pound. Some bodies have adjusted to the routine workouts as “normal” and no longer burn the extra pounds.  If so, it’s time to change your routine: change the time of day you workout, or change up what you are doing, or literally do the workout in reverse order, or in reverse (walking backwards).  Change, challenge, get out of your comfort zone so you don’t stagnate.

#6  How much you are sleeping? Too much? Too little?

Lack of sleep and stress increase cortisol levels whose job it is to find, hold onto and store fat – so if you are sooooo stressed, your body will produce this and try to add pounds to make sure you have resources for the amount of stress you are putting on your body. Is it time to rearrange your life? Priorities? Saying yes, or no to some things?

# 7  Emotions?

Are you depressed? Is this hurdle fear? Are you scared to make it passed a point you haven’t passed before? Are you sabotaging your own progress? Sometimes it’s easier to stop than keep going and face new emotions that are too huge and scary = FEAR.

Are you afraid to hope and let yourself down again? Are you convinced your body will just be that size? That you just can’t go below that number? This is a lie. Why are you believing it? What might happen if you believe differently? Are you scared?

#8  Are you expecting too much too soon?

Weight loss shows are hugely inspirational but often give us an unrealistic time-line of weight loss in real life!  Stop comparing yourself to them.  You still have a job, have a family, have to shop and cook for yourself.  Be your best you.

Work through one step and issue at a time.  The layers of weight came with layers of issues.  Work through them one at a time – one victory at a time. Doing so will allow for sustainable success.

If you work through too quickly without doing the inside AND outside work, you are setting yourself up for a yo-yo. Step back, breathe, evaluate why you are stuck – get really real – there is no guilt or pressure for why you are stuck – but dig in, dig deep, and see what the blockage might really be – is it too scary to look at? Does it involve fear or failure or addiction? Overcoming blocks/plateaus might be needed again and again as you discover new hurdles.

#9  Are you blaming someone or something for your choices?

If you had something out of your control harmful done to you, I’m sorry.  It sucks.  It hurts.  I pray there were consequences for the harm done to you physically, emotionally, or financially.  People are hurtful and lousy and selfish often.  I’m sorry.

But when it comes to food and how you take care of your body YOU decide.  Blaming your spouse or a circumstance in the past or the present will not get you healthy.  Time to do the hard work, look in the mirror.  No one is forcing bad food down your throat except for you.  You be healthy even if no one around decides to do it with you.


There are many more questions I ask in these conversations. And initially the answer to many  is “I don’t know”. It does take some time to figure out each of these. You HAVE time. Work through them one at a time. Progress can and will happen. It IS hard! You are worth fighting for. The weight didn’t show up in one month, neither will it come off in one month. Baby steps.  One foot in front of the other. But if you keep deceiving yourself about what is REALLY going on, it is only hurting you. None of the rest of us are watching or digging into your heart or judging your journey.

You are beautiful! You CAN!
I would love feedback from others too!
Do any of these ring true to what you struggle with?
Do you know your hurdle but don’t want to change it? – let’s get real, remember!
I’ve been there – I can relate!