Can Someone Hug My Heart? #UsFatGirls

Oh Man!!!!  Mean words crushed my daughter today.

If you have been following my blog for awhile, I have a son and a daughter.  I do spend more time talking about my daughter on the site because raising a daughter with a healthy self esteem is a huge challenge.  It seems like every day her beauty is under attack.

In her class this week there was an election.  The election went great all week until the last day right before voting.  It got ugly.  It got mean.  And as the venom and insults were thrown a boy called my daughter a “HOG”.  Voting happened at school before lunch.  After school pick up, carpool drop offs,  and finally getting home she began to share and sob – HOURS after the event.  She had held in the hurt all day.  His insult hit her heart.  I couldn’t undo what his words had done.  I could merely be there with her.  So we sat for about 30 minutes.  We sat and I held her and hugged it out.  We just sat there until the tears were done, together.

Jen & BrittShe cried out the junk.  She was tired but it was out of her insides.  There is power in getting it out from inside.  Stuffing inside and holding it for ‘later’ does more damage.

The next day came along and I moved beyond her “HOG” incident and even forgot about it.  As we were doing our evening together, my family members were each chatting about our day.  I was cooking, my husband was pulling out the trash, son on the couch, and my daughter was on the computer playing.   As we each shared, I told about a blog response I had gotten that day.  The person, a friend, had gotten ugly and called me “cliche'” (I explained to my daughter that cliche means someone is saying, “you aren’t anything special”).

My heart of hearts is to place value on people that have been wounded by life.  So, I’m not surprised someone would attack directly about how valuable/invaluable they think I am.  And I know, as a public speaker and blogger, I’m out there.  I’m putting myself into public scrutiny and risk support or attack – I’m over it.  I’m good with me and know who I am.  Haters gonna hate – it’s who they are, not who I am.  But . . . . . . . I still feel it.

As I shared about being called “cliche” – I was stunned by my amazing daughter’s response.  She got up from the computer, came over to the sink (where I was), and stood and hugged me and didn’t move.  She remembered.  She didn’t say anything or need to. I had held her as someone hurt her with words and here she was, 10 years old, hearing that the same thing happened to me – and came near to love on me.  It was precious and beautiful.  I had not even connected the dots, but she clearly did.

There IS drama.  There ARE hurts caused by every day life, either intentional or unintentional.  I’m thankful for those around who are beautiful souls.  That includes my daughter.  That includes you!  I’m so thankful for your words and encouragement in the midst of my beautiful mess.  I’m honored that you would take any moments of your day and read my posts.  It impacts me.  Thank you!

I pray that as life causes wounds, that you have arms that surround and care for your hurts – no words necessary!

Girls just get it, and I love that.  It’s a unique and beautiful thing!